Bureaucracy at its best!
Contributed By Sandhya sharma

Noah and Today's Ark

    One day, the Lord spoke to Noah and said, "Noah, in six months I am going to make it rain until the whole world is covered with water and all the evil things are destroyed.  But, I want to save a few good people and two of every living thing on the planet.  I am ordering you to build an ark."  And, in a flash of lightning, he delivered the specifications for the ark.

    "OK," Noah said, trembling with fear and fumbling with the blueprints, "I'm your man.  ""Six months and it starts to rain, " thundered the Lord.  "You better have my ark completed or learn to swim for a long, long time!" Six months passed, the sky began to cloud up, and the rain began to fall in torrents.  The Lord looked down and saw Noah sitting in his yard, weeping, and there was no ark.  "Noah!" shouted the Lord, "Where is My ark?" A lightning bolt crashed into the ground right beside Noah.  "Lord, please forgive me!" begged Noah.  "I did my best, but there were some big problems.  First, I had to get a building permit for the ark's construction, but your plans did not meet their code.  So, I had to here an engineer to redo the plans, only to get into a long argument with him about whether to include a fire-sprinkler system."

    "My neighbors objected, claiming that I was violating zoning ordinances by building the ark in my front Yard, So I had to get a variance from the city planning board."  "Then, I had a high problem getting enough wood for the ark, because there was a ban on cutting trees to save the spotted owl.  I tried to convince the environmentalists and the forest  and Wildlife service felt that I needed the wood to save the owls, but they wouldn't let me catch them, so no owls." "Next, I started gathering up the animals but got sued by an animal rights group that objected to me taking along only two of each kind."

    "Just when the suit got dismissed, the MoEF notified me that I couldn't complete the ark without filling an environmental impact statement on your proposed flood.  They didn't take kindly to the idea that they had no jurisdiction over the conduct of a Supreme Being."

    " Then, the corps of engineers wanted a map of the proposed flood plan.  I sent them a globe!" "Right now, I'm still trying to resolve a complaint with the equal Opportunities Commission over how many minorities I'm supposed to hire."

    "The IRS has seized all my assets claiming that I am trying to leave the country, and I just got a notice from the state that I owe some kind of use tax.  Really, I don't think I can finish the ark in less than five years."

     Further, I have this big problem with the local customs who impounded the consignment of rust free nails as I have no permit to import them duty free for charitable purposes.  With that, the sky cleared, the sun began to shine, and a rainbow arched across the sky.

    Noah looked up and smiled. "You mean you are not going to destroy the world?" he asked hopefully.

    "No," said the Lord, "the government already has."

Women Power Vs Men Poor !!

    There were 11 people hanging onto a rope that came down from a helicopter.  Ten were men and one woman.  The rope was starting to fray so they all agreed that one person should let go because if they didn't the rope would break and everyone would die.

    No one could decide who should go so finally the woman gave a real touching speech saying how she would give up her life to save the others, because women were used to giving up things for their husbands and children, giving in to men, and that after all men were the superior sex and must be saved.  When she finished speaking, all the men clapped!

Never understimate the power of a woman !

Do you Know?

World Health Day was celebrated on April 7 2002.  The theme for this year as announced by WHO is "Agita Mundo" meaning "Shake the World".  The idea emerged from sao Paolo in Brazil where a large percentage of the population suffers from obesity.  More and more people are dying of weight related diseases.  Hence the message of WHO is to spread the awareness about the need for physical exercise.

This is also applicable to us as we spend hours on end in the sitting posture and guzziling one tea after another as we entertain all and sundry.